Dino is on a rampage. I am working so hard to not let him pull me into his negativity. But not letting his nastiness affect me is difficult when I share 50/50 custody of my wonderful, brown-eyed, physics loving, one and only 14 year old and try to include Dino in relevant parental activities (such as today's doctor's appointment).
Summers bring the added joy of face to face transfers (as opposed to transfers taking place through a school day, with one of us dropping A off and the other picking A up). Dino's reason this time for the rampage is that A went swimming a few times while in my care but the Dino did not want him to go swimming (for no good reason mind you other than an unfounded concern that swimming would lead to an ear infection, which would then mess up Boy Scout scuba camp in a month's time). A had to undergo a grilling and be told that he (A) was not trustworthy and not the kind of son that the Dino expected. I went through the same grilling (for perceived ogling of any man within a few 100 feet of me, doing crazy things like taking 45 minutes to run to the grocery store instead of his allowed 30, being found out to have committed the horrible, life altering lie of sneaking to see a movie that he did not approve of - as in anything that was not G or PG, that included any sort of nudity of any kind, even a hint of any sort of marital infidelity, or any actor he thought I thought was attractive.......good thing he never found out about my love of watching Andy Garcia movies given my experience with disclosing my like of Patrick Stewart!). There is no reasoning with this, of course, because you (me or A) never really did anything wrong, bad, etc.
This has led Dino to ramp up the nastiness toward both of us, but especially me. I will not ramble on too much here - except to say that it has been so bad that I feel physically sick - reminds me of what most days were like with him.....feeling like you had done something wrong, were a bad person, no matter what you did good could not ever make up for the horrible bad thing you did (like get your haircut without telling him or inviting him along, going out to lunch with a friend at work, talking to family on the phone not in his presence, or accidentally sitting through a car commercial for which Patrick Steward did the voice over......you know - CRAZY BAD stuff like that?!).
Poor A has to go back this Saturday morning for a week, then with me, then three more weeks with the Dino, then with me. It is going to be a long summer - or at least until 8/4, when A and I are headed up north for a fun family wedding, to see Jim Gaffigan in Rochester Hills, Michigan, and to generally have a fun time until school starts. I am counting the days.
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